Kellybeans!

Aiden’s First Year

Click to see a montage I put together of Aiden’s first year.  I’m going to be pretty busy this weekend, so I figured I’d post this now, while I have time.

I’ll post my letter to my boy next week, so I’ll save all the sappy stuff for then.  All I can say is that the past year has been crazy, magical, mind-blowing, and the most wonderful one of my life.

p.s.  The montage is more than nine minutes long.  YES, it’s indulgent.  YES, it’s probably way too long.  But I’m his mommy and I couldn’t cut out any more of these cute pictures.  Just don’t say I didn’t warn you!

There are lots of things that I like to see going UP in number, including: 

• Money
• Hours that Aiden sleeps each night
• Carat size of diamonds
• Comments from ya’ll
• The value of our house

Note that I did NOT add “my weight” to that list.  Unfortunately, my body did not get the memo, and I’m up a pound this week (insert expletives here).  Actually, I shouldn’t blame my body.  It just digested and distributed the food I shoved in my pie-hole this week, which includes:

• The best steak ever, broiled in BUTTER
• Bananas Foster (heeeavennn on earth)
• Macaroni and cheese
• Grilled cheese
• French fries
• Burger
• Pasta
• Chocolate

Looking at that list, I’m honestly surprised I didn’t gain at least 5 pounds.  Maybe I should stop whining and just be grateful that the damage wasn’t worse.  Things should be easier from here, because most of that bad delicious food was eaten out at restaurants.  We’ve had a number of family celebrations that forced gave me an excuse to eat food that really shouldn’t be consumed by someone starving herself on a diet.

So!  The numbers for this week:

Starting weight:  146

Last week’s weight: 138.5

Current weight:  139.5

Weight loss this week:  0  –  One pound gain (fat ass)

Total pounds lost: 6.5

Weeks to go before swimsuit reveal:  3

I promise to show some improvement next week.  But I am still eating cake this weekend!  I deserve some fricking cake to celebrate one year of sleep deprivation, scale be damned.

How are my fellow Thin Thursday peeps doing?  Chime in with your updates!

We’ve been real busy here in the Kellybeans household.  We spent the Memorial Day weekend alternately chasing after our crazy toddler and working outside.  We planted new trees, some berry bushes, bunches of flowers, and mulched.  I am officially TIRED.  By the way, I did start that herb garden that I mentioned some weeks back.  I decided to do tomatoes, basil, rosemary, cilantro, mint, and some peppers in large containers, and so far, so good.  The plants aren’t dead, so I’m deeming it a success thus far.

This week is a bit crazy for us, as we are gearing up for Aiden’s FIRST BIRTHDAY PARTY this weekend!  I truly can’t believe the little munchkin is turning one.  I mean, this time last year… well… I can’t really put it into words.  This picture says it all, and more:

Good lord, I was huge.  And I hated those fricking ugly maternity shorts, but they fit and weren’t too short and didn’t show too much of my beastly chubby thighs, so whatevs.  Let’s just say those shorts are not due for any wear-time THIS summer.

So, yep.  This time last year I was gigantic, and waiting (IMPATIENTLY) for Aiden to make his grand entrance.  I was overdue, and struggling with the decision to induce or wait for him to mosey his way into the world.  I was SCARED.  Oh, was I scared.  Scared of labor, scared of something going wrong, scared of how I would do as a mother.

One year later, and so much has changed.  I think the party this weekend will not only be a celebration of Aiden’s 12 months on this earth, but an acknowledgement that YES!  WE MADE IT!  AND SO FAR, WE’RE DOING A PRETTY DAMN GOOD JOB!  I’m looking forward to celebrating.  And eating a lot of cake, because I deserve it.

It’s been a helluva year, and though our lives were turned upside down, I can say it was truly the best year ever.  (Can I get any more lovey dovey and cheesy?  I luv my baybeee… he is so speshul.)

You might have some images in your mind when you read the title of this post.  I am NOT going to talk about body hair in this entry.  I have some PRIDE, you know?  (Not that pride has ever stopped me from discussing that topic here before).

No, I do want to talk about hair.  On the HEAD, you naughty thing. 

Specifically, hair on boys. Check this out:

And now for some commentary by our resident judgementalist, Judgy McJudgerson.

Seriously, look at Celine Dion’s son.  His flowing mane is rivalling Celine for the “Longest, Sexiest, Waviest Hair Award.”

Or maybe the “Make Fun of Me, I Am Often Mistaken for a GIRL” Award.

To which he might reply, “It’s the ‘My Mother Is a Billionaire and I’m Rich, So Eff You, Bitches’ Award.  Get it right, Judgy.”

I don’t know.  I’m just MEH about that hair.  Not that it’s any of my business or anything (but again, did that ever stop me from opening my pie hole to yap a bit).

I actually like long-ish hair on boys.  I don’t think Aiden’s anywhere close to his first haircut, even though his adorable little locks are curling over his ears.  But trust me, his hair will never be long enough to set in hot rollers and come out looking like pageant hair.  At least, as long as I can control it.

(Why am I thinking that one day he will be a teenager, trolling this blog for ways to make his mother LOSE HER SHIT, and he will find this post and think, EUREKA! and refuse to cut his hair just to make me wig out?)

Get it?  Wig out?  Am cracking myself up over here! HAAAAAAAAA.

Anyway.  Moving on.  After just reviewing the above photo again, I have come to a conclusion that explains my vitriol toward the hairstyle of Celine’s spawn.

I think I am jealous.  My hair never looked that pretty when it was that long!  I’m off to run my fingers through my (short, chopped off) hair and plan styles for when it eventually grows out.  Isn’t it just that way?  No matter how much you like your current style, you always want something different.

Am totally saving this pic to take to my stylist one day.  “Can you make me look like Celine’s son?  Oh, and hide some of her money in my bird’s nest of hair while you’re at it.”

I’m gonna wrap this up before it gets any more crazy or nonsensical. BECAUSE I AM WARNING YOU, IT CAN!

Let’s get right to it, ’cause I have a whole garden that needs mulching.  It’s gonna take me forever.  Ah, the joys of suburbia.

Starting weight:  146

Last week’s weight: 140.5

Current weight:  138.5

Weight loss this week:  2.0 pounds

Total pounds lost: 7.5

Weeks to go before swimsuit reveal:  4

Huzzah!  Not too shabby, huh?  I’m a bit confused as to how this happened, because I didn’t eat perfectly this week (sticking to a diet, even one as flexible as Weight Watchers, is NOT EASY).  I also didn’t work out nearly as much as I should have.  But whatevs.  I’ll take it.  Helloooooo, 130’s!! 

In typical eff-it-up fashion, I celebrated my loss this week by eating marshmallows for breakfast this morning.  Yay me.  I have probably gained back a pound, but I enjoyed those damn marshmallows, okay?  Sugar is heaven.

So, how are you guys doing?  Are you sticking with it (for the most part)? Or have you fallen off the wagon and need someone to scrape you off the ground and force you back on the weight-loss ride?  Post your updates!

This week, I resolve to work out more and drink more water.  If that translates into more LB’s lost, that would be awesome! 

If you guys don’t read Miss Zoot, you’re missing out.  She’s funny, witty, and a totally cool mom.  And she just had her third baby today.

I was looking at the pics of her new little guy, and I swear, I got all teary.  It’s just such a blessing to give birth to a sweet baby.  Looking at those precious pictures made me so excited to have another one.  After all, my “baby” is walking, nearly talking, and about to turn a year old.  (WTF?  A YEAR??)

No, this is NOT a pregnancy announcement. (But a part of me wishes it was.)

And then I think, are you effing crazy?  Those early days were so hard.  You cried every day!  You haven’t slept well since before your baby was born!  You got SO FAT when you were pregnant! The baby’s just learned how to take off his diaper, making the whole house his potential toilet!  And you want to add another one to the mix??

What are you THINKING, woman? 

This. 

This is what I’m thinking, what I picture in my mind.  Not the crappy diapers, sleepless nights, or 3 hours of pushing.  I think of those early days when our family changed in a massive and miraculous way, when we were all getting know each other and became a family of three.  I miss those days, and I look forward to experiencing them again, someday, hopefully a little wiser and more experienced.

Someday.

I mean that literally.  Oh shit.

Aiden loves to run around naked.

And he just figured out how to RIP OFF HIS DIAPER.

Oh, no.  We are totally screwed.

My child will be wearing this shirt on his birthday.  Not for the entire birthday bash or anything, but this shirt WILL be put on and modeled for the amusement of the party guests.  Because we’re klassy like that.

Seriously, I already bought it.  I have no shame.  (But wasn’t that ALREADY OBVIOUS?)

Aiden slept last night from 7:30 p.m. to 5a.m.  without waking up once. That’s nearly TEN HOURS straight!

At 5 a.m. he nursed and went back to sleep until 8a.m.

This is nothing short of a miracle, and I offer my thanks to the sweet baby Jesus for this amazing feat.

Amen.

Aiden:  Hey, Sophie!  Whaddya have there?  A BALL!  I love to play ball!

Sophie:  Ball.  In my mouth.  Chewing.  Heaven.  Ahhhhhh.

Aiden:  (tug) (grunt) (pull)  Hey, doggie.  Why aren’t you sharing your ball with me?

Sophie:  Sorry, kid.  No can do.  Go play with your own toys.  Yours outnumber mine 1000 to 1.

Aiden:  Victory!  And also… mmmmmm.  Dog drool is delicious.

Sophie:  Durrrr.  Where’d my ball go?  Hey!  Mom!  Stop taking pictures and get my property out of that kid’s mouth!