We had arrived home on Saturday night around 9 p.m.  It was pretty late, and I just wanted to get Aiden into bed and crash.  At first glance, everything in the house looked okay.  And then… we went upstairs.

When we left the house, I had turned off the lights, and closed both my master bedroom door, and the door to our bathroom, which is accessible only via our bedroom.  When we got home, the door to our bedroom was open, and my bedside lamp was illuminated.  The bathroom door was open too, and that light was on.

At first, I just felt a wave of annoyance.  You see, we had hired a housesitter to take care of our home and our pets while we were on vacation.  I had found her through my local MOMS club… she was the daughter of one of the members, and had just graduated high school.  We had met prior to my vacation and she seemed respectful and responsible.  I felt I could trust her in our home.

So when I first saw the open doors and lights, I was annoyed.  I figured she had gone into our bedroom and bathroom to just snoop around a little, despite my asking her to leave those rooms alone.  But then I started to look further.

Pillows from our couch downstairs were on our BED upstairs.  Someone had tried to watch TV on our bedroom television.  My bottle of bubble bath was EMPTY, and tossed on the bathroom counter. 

Downstairs, an inspection led me to find some of Aiden’s toys strewn about OUTSIDE on our patio.  The patio and garden were littered with literally dozens of cigarette butts.  Someone had opened Aiden’s sandbox, pulled out toys, and left the lid off.  The sand had been rained on and was a big goopy mess.  I found a suspicious looking piece of foil that was singed on the edges that even I (naive and innocent) knew had been used for some illicit activity.  And a bottle of vodka hidden in our deep freezer was now sitting front and center when you opened the freezer door. Oh, and when we slid into our bed, I felt dirt and gritty sand on the sheets.  Sheets that I had changed right before we left on vacation.

All of this really pissed me off.  But the best discovery was yet to come.  The next morning, while putting away toiletries, I realized that my storage drawers had been tampered with.  These drawers are in my bathroom cabinet… the bathroom you can’t access without going into our bedroom.

I started searching through the drawers, and that’s when I realized it.  Someone had rifled through these drawers, and STOLE PRESCRIPTION MEDICATION.  I was furious.

So what did I do?  I called the police, and I called the housesitter’s mother.  I told her that her daughter had pretty much made my home “party central” and now we had been burglarized. 

To make a long story sort-of short, the housesitter denied stealing anything, and said that one of her friends must have done it.  She texted her friends, and one of them (who obviously wasn’t too smart) texted back and said she had stolen the meds and SOLD them.  The cops took the phone as evidence, arrested the girl who admitted to stealing, and threw her ass in jail.  Since she sold and distributed a bottle of narcotics, she is in BIG trouble.  Can’t say I feel too sorry for her.

I was just soooo ticked off about this whole thing.  We’ve changed our locks, since I can’t be sure that the housesitter or one of her fabulous friends didn’t copy our key.  The housesitter and her mother came by to return my old key today, and the mom made her give me check to cover the cost of my new locks.  But the amazing thing is that neither one of them even said SORRY for this whole mess.

Let me tell you, if Aiden EVER did something like this, he’d be apologizing profusely or my foot would be square up his ass.  So I guess that all’s well that ends well, but my oh my, I am SO DONE with all the drama. 

On the plus side, adorable photos of Aiden on vacation are coming up next time I post.  Plus a 14-month update on the cutest boy I know!

tap, tap.

Um, is this thing on??

Well, it appears I haven’t written anything here for nearly two weeks… and I’ve actually had plenty to talk about.  Just BUSY.  Very busy.

And last week we went on vacation, which of course I wasn’t going to broadcast to the internet because HELLO COME BURGLARIZE MY HOME! WE WON’T BE HERE!

But we were burglarized ANYWAY.  And, NO, I am not kidding. 

I’ll share the whole story later… everything is basically fine now, but my residual anger and pissed-off-ness is still quite present.  Garrrrrrhhhhhhhh.

Aiden started speech therapy this week.  Any question I had about getting him evaluated disappeared when I realized what a long process it is to get services for kids in need.  I called Early Intervention the first week of June, right after Aiden’s 12 month checkup.  Plowing through all the red tape… and here we are finally starting therapy nearly two months later.  I’m glad that I didn’t wait, for the simple reason that I’m glad he’s finally in the pipeline.  I think I would have been frustrated if I had waited until there was even greater concern over the speech delay, as I am not the most patient of people. 

The therapy is going fine, and I guess it is about as productive as you could expect it to be with a child who is just shy of 14 months old.  Aiden’s therapist is a really nice lady, she interacts with him well, and he seems to like her.  So far, she has taught me a few ways to encourage Aiden to speak but making him “work” for what he wants.  The best progress has been made with him saying “uh” when he wants us to pick him up.  He doesn’t always do it, but I more often than not, I hear that sound when he wants up.

I also think we can now officially say that “Mama” is Aiden’s first word.  He used to babble ma-ma-ma all the time, but I never felt it was in reference to me.  Now, it seems that he has figured out that saying MAMA will get my attention!  He uses the word very clearly and he looks right at me.  He also uses the word to get Daddy’s attention, too, but that’s okay!  He knows that when he says MAMA, we will respond, and I’m thrilled that he is using this verbal communication rather than just grunting at me like a little gorilla.

Funny story:  last night I was trying to get Aiden down for bed.  He’d been doing SO GREAT with sleeping recently… going to bed around 8:30 and actually sleeping through the whole night!  Absolutely amazing.  And then his molars… those EFFING MOLARS… started to come through.  And mass misery ensued.  And frequent nighttime wakings.  Like I said, EFFING MOLARS.

So, tonight.  Aiden was fighting me as I tried to get him to sleep.  I put him down and left the room, but his escalating squawks told me that he wasn’t gonna settle down.  I went back in and sat in the chair in his room, leaving him in his crib.  I sang to him for a while and he calmed down, but was still sitting up in bed.  I kept saying, “Night-night, Aiden.  Night-night.” 

And then the funniest thing happened.  He flipped on his belly and put his head down.  I said, “Night-night” and his little head popped up, and he said, “Na Na.”  Head down again.  I said, “Night-night” and his head pops up, “Na Na.”  This went on and on, with me saying night-night, and him responding with Na Na.  I think we might have ANOTHER new word.  Amazing. :) 

It’s so much fun to have a conversation with my kid.

Taking a break from all the chatting, to stop and smell the flowers.

I was driving a couple of days ago and I saw this:

I don’t know about you, but a HOT WEINER sure does hit the spot.  You know which spot I’m talking about.

Thanks, Budweiser.  And here I thought, for all these years, that you were marketing products mainly for men! Thanks for remembering that we ladies have cravings, too.

Anyone out there watch So You Think You Can Dance last night and tonight?  If so, did you see me??

I told you yesterday about my lovely dream involving the lovely Courtney from SYTYCD.  If you haven’t read it, you might wanta click on that-there link so you have a snowball’s chance in hell of understanding where I am going with this.  (Go ahead and read.  I’ll wait.) …..OK, so now you know that I got to dance as Courtney’s partner on SYTYCD, but then I totally effed it up by missing rehearsals and put her in danger of getting kicked off the show.  This was Courtney and me last week, when I nearly messed up our whole routine due to my lack of rehearsing.

Thanks to everyone who commented on the last post and complimented my gorgeous yellow sequined vest.  I love it too.  SEXAY.  I asked Wardrobe if I could keep it and they said no.  The bastards.  I might just steal one of Cat Deeley’s dresses in retaliation.

Anyway, I am so excited to announce that the saga continues!  Courtney has forgiven me for my past mistakes!  I’ve now promised her that I would never let her down again.  I promised to be the best damn dance partner she’s ever had the pleasure of working with.  I promised to make Nigel Lithgoe and Mia Michaels drool over my technique.  And Courtney took me back!  And we danced together last night!  Didja see us?  We were AWESOME.

Look at us!  Courtney is stunning and magnificent.  And I?  I am THERE FOR HER as a partner.  I STEPPED UP TO THE PLATE.  I did my job and HELD ON TO HER LEG AND HER ARM JUST SO.  I am LOOKING MIGHTY FINE IN MY TIGHT SHIRT AND PANTS, NO?  I am SHOWING A BIT OF CLEAVAGE BUT THAT’S WHAT MAKES THOSE VOTERS PICK UP THE PHONE AND VOTE FOR ME!  (Call 866-LOSER-01 right now!)

The best news is that Courtney has invited me to be her partner on SYTYCD every week!  So I’ll be posting here with updates about my new dance career.  This sure beats changing crappy diapers all day, huh??

Okay, kids.  I have a mad, mad love for So You Think You Can Dance.  We’ve been watching it from the very first season, and it’s my favorite summer TV show.  I even watched it last year when I was in the hospital giving birth.  That’s how much I like SYTYCD!

Now, I have never been a dancer.  I’m a singer.  I’ve had to dance plenty of times before (read: cheesy pageant production numbers and also many a musical).  I can learn steps and execute them without looking like too big of an ass.  I (used to) rock it out in da club and shake my booty with the best of the drunken college girls.  But by NO MEANS am I a great dancer.

That’s why last night’s dream has me laughing.  Picture it:  I’m on a cruise ship (wha?? I have no idea why) and I am hiding in various places on this ship.  I keep drinking and moving locations so I can’t be found by anyone.  And then, finally, SYTYCD choreographer Mandy Moore finds me.

Mandy:  “Kelly, I am very disappointed.  Why haven’t you been in rehearsals?”

Me:  “I don’t know.”

Mandy:  “Well, this isn’t fair to Courtney.  She is depending on you.”

Kelly:  “Whatever.”

Mandy:  “Really, Kelly.  How is she supposed to do this dance without you??  You’re her partner, and she’s been rehearsing for days without you!  The show is tonight, and YOU DON’T KNOW THE CHOREOGRAPHY!”

That’s when it hits me, right in the middle of this dream… I have apparently fancied myself as a fantastic dancer.  Not only that, I’ve paired myself up with… no…. not a guy, but a girl.  I must have some sort of secret girl crush on Courtney Galiano or something, because apparently I wanna be her dance partner, deep down in my subconscious mind.

That butch haircut I’m sporting makes SOOOO much sense now.

I just sent an email to a person concerning a super-duper serious freelance article I am writing about combat medicine in the military.

And I just realized that somehow, my email signatures got messed up. 

Instead of attaching my freelance writer signature to the bottom of the email, I mistakenly attached the one that I use for selling…. um… romance enhancement items.  {She whispers} You know, S-E-X T-O-Y-S.  Even better?  It conveniently provides the WEBSITE you can visit to view and purchase the aforementioned items. Oh. My. God. 

So, I hope this military contact enjoys perusing all the fun little gadgets that go BZZZZZZZZ in the night.

I think I might DIE of embarassment.

How does it always work out this way?

I went out yesterday after putting Aiden down for his nap, leaving Daddy in charge.  I got home more than THREE hours later, to learn that Aiden had awakened from his nap just 20 minutes earlier.  Let’s just say Daddy got to relax and get some quality XBox 360 time while I was gone.  Just twenty minutes of caring for the kid solo?  Daddy got off easy.

Today, I put Aiden down for his nap and he woke up within 30 minutes.  The HELL??  Where is MY three-hour-plus nap??  Don’t I deserve some break-time?  Apparently not.

It’s a conspiracy.  I’m certain of it.

Look at them.  Don’t they look like they would be the type to conspire against their wife/mother?

p.s.  I think Aiden’s decided to be a hotel bellhop when he grows up.

I’m sitting outside right now on our patio, soaking up a bit of sun while Aiden runs around the yard with our three (THREE!) dogs and has a jolly old time. 

Oh, how he loves being outside.  Thanks to our fenced yard, he can run all over the place without any worry of him wandering off or getting too close to the street.  I think Aiden believes he is part of the “pack” of dogs.  He chases them around, runs to the fence making little barking sounds when they make noise, and he even likes to try and drink from their water bowl.  I know, gross.  But he gets down on all fours and leans over to lap out of the bowl, and it really is cute.  And gross.  He also likes to drink from the hose.  I think I am raising a full-fledged canine here.

Right now, Aiden is carefully making his way down the little hill in our backyard, smiling at me and waving.  The sun glints off his blonde highlights and his whole head is shining like gold.  He’s tough and sturdy and sweet and innocent.  Just all boy, and all mine.

And I’m so lucky.

We got horrible news last week about a family member.  After many miscarriages, she was overjoyed to find that she was pregnant.  Due in November, we had seen her in late May and it was wonderful.  We all exclaimed over her growing belly, chatted about babies, and looked forward to future playdates.

Just before the July 4th weekend, she had a routine ultrasound that shattered her world.  Some of the baby’s organs had not developed, and she was told that there was no hope for the little baby who she had hoped to have for so long.

No mother should have to decide whether to induce labor immediately or carry a baby to term, knowing that either choice will yield the same tragic result.  No mother should have to check into a hospital over a holiday weekend to go through the stress and pain of childbirth, knowing that all of this work and pain and pushing will be for naught.  No mother should have to hold her little baby boy in her arms, a little boy who never took a single breath, and say goodbye before she even had the chance to say hello.

And then I look at my son, currently torturing the dogs by stealing their toys and streaking across the yard in a fit of giggles.  And I wonder, why?  Why does this happen?  Why have I been so blessed?  Why am I so very lucky?

I don’t have the answers.  I don’t have the capacity to understand.  I just know that I can never, never take it for granted.

We’ve been having quite a lot of fun around casa de Kellybeans this summer! Here’s the photographic evidence from the past couple of days.

Ah, the lazy days of summer.  As in, Aiden ripped off his diaper outside and I was too lazy to put a new one on.  And then I captured this little kodak moment.

Fourth of July party!  Don’t we look excited?

Aiden’s first Independence Day parade.  He loved the fire trucks and ran around grabbing candy that was hurled in our direction.

Speaking of candy… Aiden got his first taste of a lollipop at the parade.  It was the high point of his afternoon.

Pointing at the next fun float that was heading our way, while holding his little American flag.  I tell you, parades have never been so much fun.

And we rounded out the holiday weekend with an afternoon on the family boat.  Aiden decided he wanted to be captain of the boat and had a great time (just don’t notify the Coast Guard, ’cause he doesn’t have his boating license yet)!  He also got his first tattoo, which he’s been begging us to get for months.  Kids… they grow up so fast these days… LOL.

How was your weekend?